Monday, 13 April 2015

Calis 1st TV Commercial...

So after a 6am start (Who knew a kids commercial shoot could start so early?) we got a coach from Pinewood Studios to the location in West London, I actually didn't have a clue where we were because both me and Cali had a good sleep on the coach and only woke up when we reached...

Once there we went into some big hall where the producers greeted us and let us know what would be going on for the day. As the scene was a kids birthday party some of the kids got changed into party clothes while the others got changed into a fancy dress costume. There was also snacks and drinks and tea laid out for us.

The advert was for

Wednesday, 8 April 2015

How to deal with your kids acting up in public

Our Easter so far...

So since the kids spent the Easter weekend with their daddy we had a delayed Easter together on Monday. I took them out on their scooters then we walked into town (now that's a long walk but I wanted to tire them out a bit so they would sleep as soon as we got home) and met up with my cousin for some food in Wagamamas. I ordered my usual Cha Han and the kids had noodles, the only thing is I think my plan to wear them out worked too well as Cali was too tired to even eat, poor thing and she normally eats like a horse! Then because of RD's extra good behaviour he got to ride the toy train, which he loved. Also the weather held out, so our delayed Easter was a lovely day :)

Sunday, 5 April 2015

4 years...

So 30th March marked the 4th anniversary of my miscarriage and honestly I can say it hasn't gotten any easier. It still feels just as painful as it did the day it happened. I can still remember the day and the exact reason I miscarried clearly almost like it was yesterday. To be honest I don't think I will ever get over it and I think the reason why I miscarried is the main reason why I won't be able to get over it as it was through no fault of my own. If what happened didn't happen (I know it sounds cryptic) then I would now be looking forward to celebrating my babies 4th birthday along with my birthday this year.
All I did on Tuesday was just replay the scenario over and over in my head and just cry literally for the whole day. I just felt so sad I didn't even feel like doing anything, other than crying. I hate this time of the year and I also hate October, it's the worst thing to feel guilty about celebrating your own birthday when you feel you should be celebrating your babies birthday too (as the baby was due on 7th & my birthday is on 6th October). I just feel like shit basically and wish something would take this pain away. It's like how can you be heartbroken over someone you never met, but at the same time it was something that was growing inside my body so I had an immediate bond which is hard to get over when that bond is broken.
Sometimes I just feel like I have the worst luck and wonder what I did that was so wrong that bad shit keeps happening to me.