Mum: Hello who is this?
Me: It's who you just called...
Mum: It's me
Me: I know its you, but you don't seem to know who I am
Mum: Jade? Is that you?
Mum: Are you sure?
Me: Umm.. Yeah... I'm pretty sure its me
...Why couldn't I get a normal mum...
Thursday, 29 January 2015
OK well maybe not men, because I’m not ready to switch teams yet, but I have been put off relationships, just because of what happened in my past one. I always think will I ever be ready, because I know I have a lot of trust issues because of my ex and I wouldn’t want to bring all that baggage into a new relationship and put all my insecurities onto some new guy who is probably nothing like my ex and then ruin the relationship. But how do you not have trust issues after being cheated on by a man you were with for near 10 years, like how do you get out of that mindset that all men are dogs? OK a lot of men are dogs but there a few good ones out there somewhere and I’m afraid that I would get a good one and would never take his kindness as a genuine act I would be looking behind the kindness like hmmm... why is he doing all this, what is he trying to cover up?
Wednesday, 28 January 2015
Now I’ve previously written about my IBS struggles but I thought I’d do an update as it’s really bugging me. I hate the fact that there’s not one particular thing that sets my stomach off, because through CBT (Cognitive behaviour therapy) I’ve noticed that I can get a stomach ache from one food today and then be fine with it tomorrow, similarly I can also get a stomach ache when my emotions shift so as well as getting problems when I’m sad or stressed, I can also get problems when I’m happy or excited. So there’s no real trigger so I don’t even know what to avoid to stop myself from having attacks. Although one thing I know my body rejects is milk, any kinda milk, Cows, Goats, Soya, Almond, a2, Lactofree all of them do the same thing to me, it feels like someone is inside my stomach pushing outwards, it’s sooo painful, my stomach balloons and then obviously after that the party moves to the toilet.
It’s just so frustrating like I feel like I will never be able to control the symptoms because like I said I don’t know what to avoid. I even keep food diaries and there’s absolutely no pattern. I am taking medication for it, but I’m getting all them 1 in 10,000 people side effects which isn’t fun and the tablets are not stop ping the stomach problems or the severity of them when I get them. Fair enough for the most part I’m not getting stomach problems 7 days a week like I used to but it’s still a problem and still really affecting my life. Like I’m still making up excuses not to go out with friends just because I don’t wanna be out and then my stomach starts bubbling for no reason and there no toilets around, so I prefer to just stay in if I can. Which means I don’t really have a social life which is a bit sad...
Tuesday, 27 January 2015
So I've mentioned this before but since she was born Cali has been a noisy sleeper, she snores hard makes random noises and grinds her teeth. Now after she got her adenoids and tonsils removed I thought the snowing would stop or at least be less severe but it’s not, she snores like a tractor, it is soooo loud and i didn’t realise how bad it was till I had her in bed with me last week. Now there's been a few times when Cali has dropped to sleep before RD and has been noisy and RD will complain that he can’t sleep and I’ve always been unsympathetic ( I’m unsympathetic to most things after 7pm because that is mummy time lol) because if she’s nt dong something to keep RD awake, he’s doing something to keep her awake. Anywayz now I do sympathize as I just couldn’t get to sleep because of all the noise Cali makes in her sleep. I tried putting her on her side, on her stomach, at an angle, nothing worked she just continued to snore loud in my ears then when that died down the teeth grinding started and when i hear grinding teeth it makes me want to grind my teeth too (I dunno why, maybe I’m weird) I just don’t get how a 6 year can make that much noise in her sleep and ‘m not worried that it may get louder with age. But on a positive note at least she has stopped holding her breath/gasping for air during snoring, because that used to really freak me out.
Monday, 26 January 2015
Shirt - Primark
Striped bodycon dress - H&M
Thick black and gold necklace - Primark
Gold/Pearl cat ears - eBay
So as RD quickly approaches 5 I have noticed a big change in his behaviour, he has now started being super naughty and refusing to do what he’s been told. He has also started to get angry and tip over chairs and throw things around, he even threw his shoe at me the other day and OMG did he get in trouble for that. Because usually I can kinda predict when he’s gonna try and throw something and give him ‘The Bajan mummy glare’ (that I learned from my mummy) and he quickly stops thinking about throwing things.
Last week was particularly bad as he heard one of his school friends call a teacher a stupid idiot, now he came home and told me how wrong that was but then when I told him off for being naughty he was like “You Stupid? Youuuuu Stupid, You iddy-yet, you stupid iddy-yet!” the 1st time he said it (as he just kept repeating himself) I was thinking but you can’t even say it properly and obviously told him not to say it and explained why etc then when he kept on saying it I just ignored him and literally acted like he wasn’t there, then eventually he stopped.
He is also
Friday, 16 January 2015
Thursday, 15 January 2015
I sooo wish I was back here. I love my little island. Barbados is the most beautiful place, maybe I’m biased because my people are from there, but still it’s the best place ever and when the weathers as crap as it has been recently it really makes me wish I was rich enough to just fly me and the kiddies out there for the winter and come back when it’s a bit warmer. OMG can someone give me the winning number to the lottery please!!!!
Wednesday, 14 January 2015
So back in the day I didn’t know the first thing about cooking Caribbean soup, I was just rubbish at it so I would just wait until my mum or dad cooked it then I would invite myself over and fish out all the dumplings and eat them lol and even after that I would just wait for my ex to cook it, annoyingly I actually learned how to cook soup from him and it’s only recently (and by recently I mean really recent like within the past couple months) I’ve mastered the art of cooking soup. It’s always nice and thick and actually tastes good. Before it would either be thick and tasteless or too thin and runny. I tend to make a big pot to last a few days and make like a billion dumplings because just like me the kids like to fish out all the dumplings. I found that if you put a bit of
Tuesday, 13 January 2015
So I’m not really a joggers/hoodies/sneakers kinda girl but as it’s been cold I wanted something I could just chuck on at home and keep warm so I found these simple dark grey joggers and sweater in H&M for just under £15. They’re sooo soft and comfy I feel like I’ve been missing out on this level of comfort for all these years. But although they are comfy I don’t think I will be buying anymore I think one is enough for me because to be honest I will probably only wear them when the kids are away for the weekend and I’m just jammin’ in the yard.
Monday, 12 January 2015
Soooo someones birthday is coming up....My little monsters will be turning 5 and 6 very soon. OMG where has the time gone? I remember when they were little munchkins, not causing (as much trouble) and giving me headaches. I think I may do an actual real birthday party for them this year, although I feel like Cali will want to invite the whole of year 1. I was gonna let them maybe invite 5 friends each but I feel Cali will struggle with 5, RD is cool he already told me which 5 people he wants to invite. I foresee this party getting very pricey, oh the joys of having 2 kids born soon after Christmas...
Sunday, 11 January 2015
So it’s a tradition for my mum’s side of the family to get together just after Christmas and we basically eat (a lot) drink (a lot) and basically catch jokes, it’s always a good time. I dunno if it’s just a Bajan/Caribbean thing but we always have a huge ham in the evening after dinner which has to be eaten with hot sauce. So as I’d featured Chan Chams Pepper Sauce (which is made from a traditional Bajan recipe) on my Christmas Gift Guide I thought my family (who are from Barbados) would be the best people to try it and help with my review. Now I must say I’m not a big hot sauce fan,
Saturday, 10 January 2015
I always love it when my family get together, we don’t do it often enough but when we do it’s always a good time, they’re all totally bonkers but I love them all and wouldn’t change them for all the Haribos in the world.. although... I may do it for a good bottle of red wine though :)
So as I piled on the weight over Christmas I have now started to wear my ‘Fat Jade clothes’ which basically consists of leggings, a long/slouchy top and of course my new Goth boots (as they make my legs look long and thing as opposed to short and fat) So anyways I thought if I'm gonna be in leggings for a while I might as well get some cute ones. I know from past experience that H&M do some really good character leggings that last forever, obviously they’re a bit more than my usual black £3 ones from Primark but the extra money was definitely worth it for these Mickey Mouse leggings, they’re very quirky and I know they will never go see through after washing/wearing them a few times.
Mickey Mouse leggings - H&M
The Misfits retro oversized vest - Redbubble.com
Biker jacket - New Look
New Rock Goth Boots - New Rock shop in Camden
Friday, 2 January 2015
So it seems like literally every night is fight night at home with Cali and RD. Most times I just try and leave them to get on with it and when they've finished fighting either one of both come running and crying to me and I just listen and don't really do much because I always see how it starts and can always predict how it will end and normally the one crying the loudest normally deserved the hard hit. Although most fights are started by Cali and the thing with her is she loves to hit first and can't take getting hit back and RD will allow her to hit him a lot before he attacks and I keep telling her not to hit people 1st because one day someone (who is not her brother) will turn around and hit her back hard and seriously hurt her. Sometimes I feel like I'm watching some WWF match because they really go for it and although they both tend to get hurt it doesn't seem to stop them from fighting again. From what I've been told from older people who have grown kids close in age, the fighting is not likely to stop anytime soon, But saying that once they've finished fighting they're back best friends and playing nicely seconds later like nothings happened. Sometimes I just can't keep up, which is another reason why I try not to get too involved.
Thursday, 1 January 2015
After including Baby Annabell in my Christmas gift guide I realized there are a lot of accessories for her and seeing as they’re not the cheap I thought I’d narrow it down to 2 that Cali has and loves. OK, so another of my top picks is the comfort seat, it’s basically a mini version of a babies car seat. It’s pretty, pink and super girly and has an adjustable handle, so you can either have the handle bar at the top to carry it like a normal car seat or you can swing it round to the back so that Annabell can sit up. This has not left Calis arm since I gave it to her. She has to take this everywhere, like literally everywhere, she even puts a seatbelt on it when she’s in the car. This and the changing bag have made her turn into a mini mama and after she has rocked baby Annabell to sleep in it no one is allowed to make any noise near the comfort seat.. Also the seat is very sturdy and doesn't look or feel like flimsy cheap plastic so it should last a while (unless they have a 4 year old brother who thinks it’s the greatest thing ever to try and sit inside it) but although it is very sturdy it’s still light enough for a 5 year old to carry with Annabell inside. I’m actually amazed that I managed to get her to leave it at home when she went to school.