‘Reliving my youth’ post, it made me question when the last time was I was simply Jade and not Mummy Jade. Although I love being a mummy, I don’t have much of a social life as I’m in Mummy Mode pretty much all the time. Most times (as much as the kids can sometimes get on my nerves) I don’t wanna leave them to go out and the times when they’re away, I basically can’t be assed to go anywhere as I know I will have some kinda panic attack which will lead to stomach problems and ruin my day anyway. I know I should go out more but its just hard, then when I don’t go out I feel old and boring and realistically I’m not all that old to be feeling like a grandma. Speaking of grandmothers even my mum goes out more than me, shit even my kids have more of a social life than me. But I guess I’ve been hiding behind the kids for so long that I’ve kinda lost my identity a bit and find myself being quite quiet/shy and reserved around people when I do go out, which is not my personality at all, but I just feel like I don’t know who I am anymore outside of being a mummy.